Only the Young are Good
by Bookworm290
Summary: Life, simply put, is /different/ when you're young... -slightly AU one-shots- ft. Bramble,Tawny,Squirrel,Raven...
1. Simply Memories

**Only the Young are Good**

Simply Memories

_Bramblekit was trembling with excitement. Ashkit_ and Fernkit, like always, had been sent outside by Frostfur to play before they 'destroyed the nursery' and 'disturbed the younger kits' - namely, Bramblekit and his sister. Tawnykit's eyes were still closed, but Bramblekit was bored stiff waiting around in his nest all day. Usually he sat at the entrance of the nursery and looked out at the camp with gleaming eyes, but today, today would be different.

Fernkit and Ashkit stumbled out into the clearing, and Bramblekit followed behind them, silent as a shadow. He stopped right outside the nursery, his eyes widening in amazement. The camp was so much bigger then it seemed from inside the nursery!

Hearing a squeal nearby, Bramblekit looked to his side to see that his denmates were rolling around in the dirt. Wiggling his haunches, Bramblekit could feel a purr rumbling in his throat as he leaped on top of the kit-pile. Both Ashkit and Fernkit let out muffled 'oomph!'s of surprse at the added weight. But, taking it in stride, it became a three-cat battle, every cat for themselves. Bramblekit was purring full-on now; he'd never had so much fun in his life! He could feel adrenaline coursing all throughout his tiny body, from his pink nose to his tabby tail. Dirt from the ground was being grinded into his pelt as rolled over repeatedly, trying to throw off Ashkit before Fernkit pounced on them both.

But Fernkit never got the chance.

"Bramblekit! What are you doing?" Ashkit and Bramblekit instantly leaped away from each other as Goldenflower padded out of the nursery. "Why aren't you in your nest?" the queen asked, stopping in front of Bramblekit.

"I...I wanted to play..."

His mother bent over him, and he involuntarily flinched before he felt her tongue slide across his head. "You only had to ask." she murmured. "I was worried when I couldn't see you."

Hot embaressment washed over his pelt. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright. Do still want to stay out here?" Bramblekit nodded. "Okay. But don't stay out too long. Come in if you're tired or hungry."

Bramblekit waited till Goldenflower had returned to the nursery before turning around again to find Ashkit and Fernkit. Ashkit was staring across the clearing, his tail tip twitching slightly. He turned towards Bramblekit when he heard his pawsteps. "You still want to play?"

"Yeah!" Bramblekit said enthusiastically. "But where'd Fernkit go?"

"Oh, she went off to see the elders." He snorted. "Why she'd want to go see them again, I don't know. We just went yesterday, and they don't have any new stories." Bramblekit twitched his ear. Maybe he could go there with Tawnykit when she was ready, since they'd never been there. But for now...

"Attack!" Bramblekit pounced on Ashkit. Bramblekit couldn't imagine his life getting any better then this.

* * *

><p>Bramblepaw stalked into the apprentice's den, his tail twitching angrily. It wasn't even close to sun down, but he didn't care. If Fireheart felt the need to come and blame him for anything, he wasn't planning on being hard to find.<p>

Bramblepaw pushed some unscented moss together into a sloppy nest, then flopped down onto it, curling up as tight as he could with his tail covering his nose. Tawnypaw crept in cautiously after him, glancing around their new den for the first time. Thornpaw was asleep in his nest at the opposite side of the ferns, his chest rising and falling rapidly and his eyes searching underneath their lids.

"He must be having a bad dream." Tawnypaw whispered.

Bramblepaw snorted. "I wouldn't doubt it if it was about us taking over and killing every cat in this Clan."

Tawnypaw looked shocked almost beyond words. "Bramblepaw...one of his denmates just died, and another one is scarred for life. How can you say that?"

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe we should check with Fireheart to make sure that we're not talking about anything too treachereous." Bramblepaw drawled sarcastically.

Tawnypaw's gaze hardened. "Fine. You can be a complete mousebrain, but don't expect me to stoop to your level."

"You're not angry?" Bramblepaw asked incrediously.

"_Of course_ I'm angry!" Tawnypaw spat. "I'm just trying to forget about it. I barely know Tigerstar, and I'm not planning on doing anything remotely close to what he did. So, I'm going to grow up and get over it."

She spun around, leaving the den much faster then when she'd come in. Bramblepaw snorted again. "Good riddance." he muttered under his breath before dropping his head onto his paws and staring blankly at the ground.

* * *

><p>Bramblepaw wasn't sure how long he layed there, unmoving, with Thornpaw twitching and letting out little squeaks every now and again. It felt like days, moons, even, but he knew that almost no time had passed at all.<p>

Fernpaw was the first to come in. She settled down into her nest, pretty much right in between Bramblepaw and Thornpaw. She fell asleep almost instantly, after mumbling a quiet 'Hey, Bramblepaw'. Darkstripe must've worked her hard for her to be so exhausted. Bramblepaw felt a tiny twinge of guilt in his chest. Other then walking around the territory and figuring out _why_ everybody in the Clan gave him funny looks every so often, he'd done pretty much nothing all day.

Next, Ashpaw came in. His tail and ears were slightly drooped, but his eyes were gleaming with satisfaction. He laid down next to his sister, on Bramblepaw's side. He began to groom himself before looking to Bramblepaw. "So? How was your first day as an apprentice? With the deputy as your mentor, no less!"

Bramblepaw knew that his denmate was trying to be friendly, but at the moment, Bramblepaw felt like scratching the friendliness right off of Ashpaw's face.

"Oh, terrific." Bramblepaw muttered, just loud enough for Ashpaw to hear him. "Well, about as terrific as a murdurer's son can have!"

Ashpaw looked hard at Bramblepaw. "So you found out, huh?"

Bramblepaw glared accusingly. "How long have you known?"

"About as soon as I could understand words, I guess." Ashpaw admitted, dropping his gaze to his paws. Bramblepaw involuntarily kicked out his leg.

"Look, I'm sorry Bramblepaw. But he's just some tom that happened to father you, right?" Ashpaw looked up again, eyes wide with concern for his friend.

"Yeah, but the whole Clan seems intent on making me believe that it's not just happenstance, but an omen for the future or something!"

Ashpaw sat up a little straighter, his eyes filling with something that Bramblepaw couldn't name. "So what? Who ever said that you have to believe them, or even listen to them?"

"But, I-"

"_You_ decide your destiny, along with StarClan. No one else has any say!"

"Ashpaw-"

"Tigerstar, Mousefur, Dappletail, Darkstripe, Fireheart, me, anyone! They mean nothing unless you _let_ them mean something."

"You don't-"

"Your life is your life alone. So you live it however you want. And, eventually, cats will accept that you are _you_, exactly as you are. _Bramblepaw_, not Tigerstar."

Bramblepaw sat in silence for a few seconds. His friend has stunned him. He sounded so..._wise_.

After a few seconds turned into a few minutes, Bramblepaw scrambled to give Ashpaw an answer. Eventually, all he could come up with was, "Thank you."

Ashpaw's eyes were softer now, the passion that had filled him before drained out. "Your welcome."

Simple words, but sometimes, that's all that is needed.

* * *

><p><em>Brambleclaw jerked, his eyes opening as<em> he sat up quickly. There were no enemies, his Clanmates were safe, and he was here in his nest in the warrior's den, but...his side felt...bare. Cold. Squirrelflight wasn't there.

No, she was on the other side of the den, her ginger fur blending into a certain tom's pale gray fur. Brambleclaw felt a pang in his chest, his heart aching as his mind scrambled to understand...and remember. He felt as if he should remember something...had he had a dream? He had, hadn't he?

Well, it wasn't like he'd gone to see Tigerstar, so it couldn't be that important, could it?

Putting it out of his mind, he just wish that he could find some way to have things right with Squirrelflight again. Anything too elaborate wouldn't work, she always preferred straight-forward words...simple words.


	2. Don't Drown Without Me

**Only the Young are Good**

Don't Drown Without Me

_Tawnypaw padded through the trees, as_ quiet as if she was stalking a mouse. Sprinting from one tree to the next, she constantly checked over her shoulder.

Once, Tawnypaw had overheard One-eye telling stories about Tigerstar to Snowkit (useless, as they now knew, Snowkit having been deaf) and One-eye had said rather loudly, 'Guilt makes cats paranoid, unless that cat is Tigerstar'. Tawnypaw had bristled at the comment about her father, but now, all she could think about was the first part - _guilt makes cats paranoid. _Tawnypaw felt extremely paranoid right now, but...she wasn't guilty of anything. Well, if you counted leaving your birth Clan as something to be guilty of...but Tawnypaw just thought of it as an escape. Smallear was an insensitive mousebrain, and if that was how ThunderClan was going to treat her, then she was leaving. She felt like she was drowning in hate, or distrust, or suspicion, or whatever ThunderClan thought of her, a completely innocent cat who'd never fought a single battle. Every innocent cat deserves to be treated with respect and fairness, and she _was_ innocent.

Except for the leaving her Clan part.

There was the tunnel that went under the Thunderpath. Crinkling her nose at the sharp, acrid stench, Tawnypaw took in a deep breath and stood at the very edge of the smooth Twoleg material. Looking over her shoulder, she knew this would be the last time that she looked at these beautiful oaks, ashes, and beeches as the trees of her home.

_T__his is it,_ she thought. And she stepped into the tunnel, being swallowed up by the blackness.

* * *

><p>She followed the ShadowClan scent through their territory, trying to find the strongest source of it, their camp. She walked past a large oak tree (not one of her - er, <em>their<em> oak trees) and there it was. The ShadowClan camp. And a patrol, glaring at her menacingly right in front of it. She didn't recognize them, never having been to a Gathering. The leader of the patrol was a dark ginger she-cat, with a small tabby tom on her left, and a ginger apprentice to her right.

Tawnypaw gulped. She wouldn't fancy fighting any of them.

The she-cat growled and spat at her. "What are you doing on our territory?"

Tawnypaw lifted her head up high. She had to prove herself to this cat. "I'm here to see my father." she meowed confidently.

"Russetfur," the tabby whispered, "D'you think she-"

Russetfur cut off the small tom, her eyes narrowing thoughtfully. "You must be...Tawnypaw?"

"Yes." Tawnypaw shot a glance at the apprentice. He looked straight at her, and his eyes were full of...wonder? Amazement? _Because I'm his leader's daughter._ Tawnypaw assured herself.

Russetfur drew her attention again. "So, you've come to join your father, have you? Had enough of those ThunderClan mousehearts, or are you spying for them?" The ginger's voice was conversational at first, then hardened as she accused the young apprentice before her.

Tawnypaw felt a spark of anger inside her. "No! I left them by my own choice. Now take me to see my father!" She winced inwardly, hoping this battle-hardened warrior wouldn't claw her nose off for her commanding tone.

But instead, Russetfur's eyes once again narrowed with thoughtfulness. "Alright, we'll take you to see Tigerstar. I just hope you can keep up." And with a flick of her tail, she burst past Tawnypaw, away towards the centre of ShadowClan territory. Her patrol followed her, the ginger apprentice looking back once, as if beckoning her to follow. So she did.

Tawnypaw pushed herself harder and harder, until the only cat in front of her was Russetfur. Tawnypaw wasn't ready to question her authority _that_ far - not yet, at least.

* * *

><p>Tawnypaw pulled up next to the tabby tom, her sides heaving as she trotted across the Twoleg bridge. They were going into RiverClan territory. For a moment, Tawnypaw was confused, till she remembered the crazy <em>TigerClan<em> that her father was leading. She wasn't sure of the idea of it, but if more cats together kept them safe, then that might be okay. At least here, she'd be away from idiots like Smallear. They travelled along the river for a bit, then turned deeper into the territory. The whole time, they travelled in silence.

Eventually, they came to a clearing, where a mix of RiverClan and ShadowClan warriors were gathered. Looking around, Tawnypaw quickly took in three facts that almost wanted to make her run back to her mother and brother and, StarClan forbid, _Smallear_. First, Tigerstar and Leopardstar were both standing on a pile of bones, there was the body of a dead warrior lying in front of them, and about five warriors were just stumbling into the clearing on the opposite side, bleeding from various wounds, one being Blackfoot, who Tawnypaw recognized from description.

Russetfur stayed hidden at the edge of the clearing, a desicion that Tawnypaw decided she didn't want to go against. As they watched from the shadows, Leopardstar leaped down from the pile of bones, then flicked her tail to a couple of cats.

"Shadepelt, Heavystep. Take the body back to our camp." Tawnypaw noticed that her voice caught on the word 'body'. Two RiverClan cats stepped forward, their pelts slightly fluffed out, as if they'd just witnessed something they wanted to forget about.

Then Tawnypaw realized. What was a dead body doing in the middle of this clearing? Had there been a fight between two cats of TigerClan?

There had to be, because as Shadepelt and Heavystep passed the ShadowClan cats without even seeing them, Tawnypaw could see the wounds scoring the dead warrior's side. He had been murdured.

What was going on here? And what exactly had Tawnypaw gotten herself into? She just hoped that whatever she had thrown herself into wouldn't be too deep that she'd drown in it.

Then Tigerstar leapt down from the bones and stalked over to the bleeding warriors. "What happened?" he spat.

Blackfoot took a hesitant half-step forwards. "The prisoners...they escaped." _Prisoners?_ Tawnypaw wondered.

"And how did they do that? Fly over all of your heads? But no, you're all bleeding, so you must have been attacked by them. Five strong warriors, beaten by a single weakling warrior and two pathetic apprentices?" Tigerstar's voice was deep as ever, but it contained malice, sarcasm, and patronization, things that Tawnypaw had only heard in the voices of those like Smallear. "Beaten by _traitors_? Unbelievable." Tigerstar finished his verbal attack, his voice lowering dangerously.

"N-no, Tigerstar." Blackfoot's gaze was focused on the ground. "It...it was Firestar." Tawnypaw's eyes widened at hearing the name of her leader - _ex_-leader. "And the half-breeds' father, along with some other warriors. They attacked us and took the prisoners across the river."

Right then, Tawnypaw saw Darkstripe standing off on his own at the edge of the clearing a cross between a scowl and a smirk on his face as he nursed wounds of his own. Almost instinctivly, she flinched away from the tabby tom who had been banished for trying to kill a tiny kit.

"What's going on?" She whispered to herself.

"Welcome to TigerClan." The ShadowClan apprentice came up beside her. Tawnypaw stared at him. Was he being serious or sarcastic? From looking into his eyes, Tawnypaw could only guess that he was kind of both.

Russetfur stepped forward. "Alright, I think we've waited long enough. Let's go greet your father, Tawnypaw." Tawnypaw's head whipped forward as her heart began to beat faster. Would Tigerstar be pleased to see her? Or would he shut her down, reject her, leave her on her own in a world where she wouldn't be able to swim on her own?

As the patrol walked into the clearing, Tanwypaw noticed that no cat was really staring at her like she was a stranger. _Maybe because ShadowClan assumes I'm RiverClan, and vice versa. _

Tawnypaw watched as Blackfoot and the rest of his patrol left the clearing with tails drooped. "Tigerstar!" Russetfur called once they were no longer visible. "I think I have someone you might be interested in seeing."

With Russetfur in front of her, the apprentice on her left and the tabby tom on her right, Tawnypaw felt like she was being guided in like an enemy warrior. _And, until Tigerstar accepts you, you kind of are._ Behind the apprentice's shoulder's, she could see Darkstripe stand up in surprise out of the corner of her eye.

Tigerstar turned to face the patrol, his huge shoulders barely registering in Tawnypaw's racing mind. His eyes glinted with _something_ as they took in the four cats in front of him. He stepped forward, making Tawnypaw want to step back, especially when Russetfur and the other cats backed away.

"Tawnypaw? Have you come for a visit?" Tawnypaw practically trembled at the sound of her father's voice.

"N-no Tigerstar. I...I want to..." Tawnypaw trailed off, realizing that she sounded like a weakling_. Going to drown in your own fear, are you_? She took in a quick breath before starting again. "I've come to join TigerClan. I want to be with you."

Tigerstar flicked his tail at the other cats. "Leave us. I'll talk to my daughter alone now." Tawnypaw tensed, looking behind her to watch as the others padded away. Only the apprentice looked back, his ginger fur ruffling slightly.

"So, daughter of mine, what exactly has driven you to leave precious ThunderClan?" Tigerstar's question sounded innocent enough, but through it, Tawnypaw could sense just what Tigerstar thought of their precious ex-Clan. He had tried (and sometimes succeeded) in killing every last cat in that Clan, and plotted to make those cat's lives miserable. That terrified Tawnypaw. But, unfortunately, it terrified others too, and they, in turn, decided to pin those actions on her. Which was exactly why she'd left. But looking up at the scratched face of her father, Tawnypaw felt a truth trickle through her like a stream of leafbare-cold water. No matter what the truth was.

Tigerstar would not like the truth. So, Tawnypaw had to give him what he wanted. "I was getting tired of listening to all those cats whining about life being hard while they sat around doing nothing." Tawnypaw winced inwardly at her words of betrayal to her Clanm - _ex_-Clanmates. But she had to continue. She wasn't done yet. "Then I realized, why should I have to put up with ThunderClan's blindness to a solution that was right in front of their eyes?"

Leader looked down on apprentice, taking in the words. Then, before Tawnypaw could take in a breath to finish, Tigerstar finished for her. "So you joined the solution." he murmured, his voice silky smooth. Without another word, Tigerstar turned and stalked to the pile of bones, jumping up onto it and yowling for everycat's attention before Tawnypaw could blink.

"Cats of TigerClan, today we are going acknowledge this young apprentice here as a member of our glorious Clan. Even if ThunderClan will not see reason, at least one cat has!"

Tawnypaw crouched alone in the centre of the clearing, suprise freezing her senses. She could faintly hear Tigerstar's voice continuing on with whatever he was saying to make them accept a ThunderClan apprentice into their ranks. She slowly stood up as she realized that Tigerstar was gazing down at her with what could only be described as 'fatherly pride'.

"Tawnypaw! Tawnypaw!" The calls of the TigerClan cats surrounded her, weak, half-hearted, and pathetic, and that was the moment that she missed ThunderClan the most.

* * *

><p>Over the next few days, Tawnypaw learnt a few things.<p>

She didn't think she'd ever be able to have much respect for Blackfoot after seeing him at his lowest on that first day. (She felt the same about Darkstripe, but she avoided him as much as possible.)

The traitors that escaped on the day she had arrived were Featherpaw and Stormpaw, Graystripe's kits, along with Mistyfoot, Bluestar's only living kit. (The dead warrior had been Stonefur, Mistyfoot's brother.)

The other cats in the ShadowClan patrol she had came to the camp with were Littlecloud and Rowanpaw. (She spent most of her time with them. Everybody else was too scared, or something.)

Other than those things, she was also learning about TigerClan. Or, rather, the non-existancy of it. Really, it was pretty awkward between RiverClan and ShadowClan cat's. And she was neither.

The thought of being Clanless terrified her, but she knew deep down inside that being the daughter of the most feared warrior ever to live in the forest kept her safe. Besides fear for herself, she couldn't help but wonder about hhe three ex-RiverClan cats. She knew she could probably safely assume that they were in ThunderClan, but...what if they weren't? Would they make it on their own?

Tawnypaw couldn't help but sympathize with them. She wasn't dumb - she'd figured out that they'd been branded as traitors for the same reason that she'd left ThunderClan. Parentage. And...she wanted to meet them. She wanted to _know_ these brave cats, wanted to greet them, befriend them, and help them.

When she lay awake at night, resting amongst the reeds, listening to the river rush through its bed and unknown cats snore and dream away nearby, she smirked sarcastically at the irony of the fact that she was so close to meeting the cats that she so desperately daydreamed after.

* * *

><p>After the battle was over, Scourge was dead, and peace was once more in the forest, Tawnypaw mewed a quick goodbye to her mother and brother before following Blackfoot to ShadowClan territory. She'd only been there once, but now, it was to be her home. She looked over her shoulder once more, at this place of peace that Tawnypaw would only ever be able to see as a place where she almost drowned in death, destruction and blood.<p>

(Later in life, she'll never go to Gatherings at Fourtrees if she doesn't have to.)

She thought she could see three cats break away from the throng of cats to join RiverClan, two smaller and one bigger. Tawnypaw, once realizing who they were, couldn't help her claws digging into the soft earth as she growled at the lost chance.

"Tawnypaw? You coming?" Looking forward again, she could see Rowanpaw waiting patiently, and just beyond him, Littlecloud. Oh, well. She'd survived the fight against BloodClan, and she was still alive enough to yearn after the thought of meeting a certain three cats.

So she couldn't help but purr as she ran to catch up with her new life.

* * *

><p>When Tawnypaw was almost done her apprenticeship, she called out for RiverClan's two newest warriors. She's pretty sure that other than RiverClan cats, only Graystripe rivaled her in yowling out for Feathertail and Stormfur. It was only when Tallstar started speaking did she realize that she was sitting right next to a RiverClan cat. The RiverClan deputy, actually. Mistyfoot.<p>

For a few heartbeats, Tawnypelt couldn't move, but she did, turning to one of her heroes and saying, "Are you proud of her?"

Mistyfoot looked down at the young cat next to her in surprise, and Tawnypaw winced slightly at what she'd done. Why would the deputy of RiverClan talk to a nameless apprentice like her? But she did. Mistyfoot blinked before replying warmly, "Yes, I am. More than any cat could ever know." The blue-gray she-cat looked across the clearing to the two new warriors. "They've worked harder than most cats to get where they are today."

"You mean because of their father?"

Mistyfoot glanced back at Tawnypaw. "Yes." She stared at her, almost seeming to be expecting something.

"W..." Tawnypaw couldn't believe she was going to ask her this. "Was it hard for you, too?"

The older queen looked down at her with a new light in her eyes. "No, not really. Everyone believed that we were Graypool's kits. We never even knew until after Feathertail and Stormfur were born. I mean,_ I_ never knew."

"I joined ShadowClan on the day that you left. I...I saw your brother's body." Tawnypaw's fur burned.

"You're Tigerstar's daughter, aren't you?"

Tawnypaw nodded. "I didn't really love my father, but being somewhere I would be accepted, even if it was forced because he was leader, seemed better to me then being scorned for a cat who left the Clan before I could even talk."

"...I know what you mean." And as Tawnypaw looked up at the she-cat she respected so much, she knew that she did know.

They both knew.

* * *

><p><em>First, the dream terrified her, to<em> be honest. Then, she tried talking to one of her oldest friends, now her Clan's medicine cat, about the possibility of warriors having prophetic dreams. When Littlecloud brushed off the idea with a snort, Tawnypelt was even more scared then before. _Brambleclaw. Brambleclaw can help, w_as how she calmed herself.

And he did, to an extent. What were the chances of two cats having the exact same wacky dream? It must have some realness to it.

It was only expected that Tawnypelt only barely held in her excitement when Stormfur and Feathertail walked down to Fourtrees. And later, once they'd made their plans, the thought of travelling with these two maked her paws tingle.

* * *

><p>The sun was setting, causing Tawnypelt to squint as she stumbled forwards, ever onwards. She heaved in another breath of air, only to choke on the stench of the Twolegplace. Too tired to talk out loud, she kept her thoughts to herself. <em>Great StarClan, if Purdy leads us to one more dead-end...<em>

She watched Brambleclaw shoot her a glance out of the corner of her eye, then mutter something to Squirrelpaw. Tawnypelt's legs tensed, knowing what was coming.

"Hey, Purdy, let's stop here for the night!" She wanted to pounce on her brother, although in happiness or anger, she wasn't sure.

But she was too tired. And her shoulder was just _killing_ her. _No! I_ refuse_ to drown in pain. Pain is useless._ Squirrelpaw trotted over to her, then proceeded to sit down next to her and lick her shoulder clean of the Twoleg gunk that had gotten into her shoulder over the day. She winced occaisonally, the apprentice's tongue as sharp physically as it was verbally.

As the sun disappeared and the moon rose, Tawnypelt drifted in and out of an uneasy sleep. At one point, the gentle tongue of Feathertail replaced Squirrelpaw's, and then again she woke up to find a new face by hers. "Stormfur?" she asked. "Shouldn't you be resting?"

He shook his head, pausing his rhythmic strokes on her shoulder. "I couldn't sleep, so I figured I might as well be of some use, let my sister get some rest." His tail flicked over to where there was a pile of fur, pale gray mixed with dark gray.

_Of course._ "You're very close to your sister, aren't you?" Tawnypelt's shoulder twitched as Stormfur once again began to soothe it.

"We had to be. We were raised with the whole world against us. You stick with who you can, and I'm glad I got stuck with her. I love her more than anything in the world."

Tawnypelt whispered "I can tell." Then, gathering her courage, she meowed, "You know, I've always looked up to you and Feathertail."

Stormfur looked up in surprise. "But we're barely a moon older than you. Why would you look up to _us_?"

"Well, along with Mistyfoot, I've wanted to know you two since you escaped from...TigerClan." Tawnypelt explained cautiously. She knew this was thin ice she was walking on.

Stormfur bristled slightly, Tawnypelt's shoulder long forgotten between them. "Why, though?"

"Because, to me, that had to be the bravest thing I'd ever heard of."

"But you were part of TigerClan!"

"The day you left was the day I joined! Stonefur's body was still in the clearing when I arrived!"

Stormfur recoiled. "He was my mentor, you know." He was whispering, and that was when Tawnypelt realized that their voices had been getting quite loud. "And he had been told to kill us. When he refused, they killed him."

"I'm sorry." They stayed silent for a minute, letting Stonefur rest in peace at last. Or, at least, that's what it felt like for Tawnypelt.

"But you know, I always thought that _you_ were brave. I mean, first I thought you were just another ShadowClan cat born in the wrong place. But now that I know you and your brother, I can hardly imagine...Me and Feathertail thought our lives were difficult because of our father, but _your_ father must have made your lives so much worse."

"Why do you think I went to Tigerstar in the first place?"

Silence stretched out again. Tawnypelt noticed the full moon, with Silverpelt canvassed around it, covering the night sky in a soft glow that came down to rest on their own pelts, turning dark grey to an almost white.

"I just don't understand..." Stormfur trailed off. Tawnypelt looked to his face, encouraging him to continue. "Why didn't your brother go with you? Did he really not want to go across the river?"

Tawnypelt gave a sarcastic purr, staring down at the grass before answering. "I didn't ask Brambleclaw to come with me." Stormfur shuffled around, shocked. "I didn't tell anyone I was leaving. They would've just stopped me, told me that everything would be okay and that cats would see me for who I was eventually." Tawnypelt whipped her head up to look at her companion, her gaze hard. "Except I got tired of waiting for 'eventually'. Yes, I love my brother and mother, and no, I don't love my father, I never did. But...ThunderClan was difficult. Brambleclaw was -is- good enough for them, even with those looks that Firestar gave him. I wasn't. I couldn't handle it, and I didn't even get the worst of it. Brambleclaw faces the challenge that I never will - _looking exactly like the most hated cat in Clan history_. And even though he has all that to deal with, he is one of the greatest cat's that I know. Yes, I still get my trouble in ShadowClan, but not for my parent's blood - for my _Clan_ blood. Russetfur refuses to accept me because of my mother, not my father! What kind of crazy cat is she? I..." Tawnypelt looked down from the moon - _When did I start looking up there?_ - and back to Stormfur. "I'm sorry. I...I'm rambling. You should get some rest."

"I think you need rest more than I do." Stormfur meowed realistically. He didn't even mention her rant. "I don't think I can sleep now. I have a lot to think about." He pushed himself off the ground, turning to leave before looking back and saying, "Thank you, Tawnypelt."

She thought she wouldn't be able to fall asleep. She thought she'd fall into a pool of memories that she wouldn't be able to climb out of on her own. But she did sleep.

(And he didn't. After taking the watch from her brother, he then hunted for her the next morning.)

* * *

><p>Tawnypelt growled as she watched her friends leave the cave with the strange, funny-sounding cats. Without her. <em>I hate this stupid wound.<em>

Time passed. She wasn't sure how much, unable to see the sun through the waterfall. They'd been at the Tribe of Rushing Water for two days and she was healing, she could tell. Just not enough for her brother.

As she waited for a familiar face to return, even if it _was_ Feathertail with a crabby apprentice padding after her, she slept, she talked to Star, she sat still as Stoneteller put unidentifiable herbs on her shoulder.

Then Stormfur returned. Brook was with him, as seemed to be becoming the norm. But then Brook got called away by a Tribe member, and she murmured a goodbye to Stormfur, her tabby tail flicking as she turned around. Stormfur walked back to where the Clan cats' nests were, his ears pricking uncomfortably as at least three cat's gazes followed him across the cave. _Odd, that they're so interested in him._ Although Stormfur looked more concerned then confused by the extra attention.

Before Stormfur could utter a word, Tawnypelt asked quietly, "Do you ever feel scared? I mean, really scared, not scared before a battle, or scared of whitecough in leaf-bare, but so scared that you'll _drown_ in it if you're not careful?"

Stormfur sat down carefully beside her, his fur just barely brushing hers. "Yes." he admitted simply. "I felt terrified when they told Stonefur to kill us. Or when Graystripe and Firestar were trying so hard to save us, and we couldn't even jump over a few stones...what about you?"

Tawnypelt looked at him in surprise. "What makes you think I've been scared like that?"

"You wouldn't be able to describe it if you've never experienced it." Stormfur mewed gently.

"Oh. Well, when I first got to that clearing in RiverClan, and I saw Tigerstar snapping at Blackstar and the other warriors for letting half-breeds and traitors escape-" Stormfur inhaled quickly. "- and I saw him as I'd never seen him before. I saw him for what he really was. And...and I was scared when he died. I was scared that the thing closest to home had died with him, and I would be rejected everywhere that I went."

A familiar and comfortable silence settled between them. Stormfur spoke first. "Are you still scared?"

"Yes." Tawnypelt whispered. "And it's _so stupid_, because I've lived with ShadowClan for so long, and Tigerstar's been dead for a long time, but...he's always there. When I sleep."

"In your dreams, or your nightmares?"

Tawnypelt met Stormfur's haunted gaze, passing the truth to him without words. Stormfur nodded. Drowning in fear is impossible, Tawnypelt was assured to find, especially when you have a RiverClan cat by your side.

* * *

><p>Once, and <em>only<em> once, did Tawnypelt let herself turn over the idea of _Stormfur_ in her mind. She had to admit that the thought had been at the edge of her mind for ages, and she just wanted to get it over with and get it all out.

What if Stormfur hadn't been a prisoner in TigerClan, and they had lived in the same clan, even if it was just for that small amount of time? What if her eyes had been drawn to a gray pelt, rather than a ginger one? What if, even before they were apprentices, Stormfur and Feathertail had stayed in ThunderClan with their father? What if Tawnypelt had stayed, too? What if - ?

Tawnypelt shook her head, casting out these _Stormfur_ thoughts before she could drown in them.

If she was honest with herself, Tawnypelt would admit that the thoughts still lingered within her, until -

Feathertail died.

And a part of Crowpaw died with her.

Tawnypelt promised herself then, in that moment, as they buried a silver cat amidst the rushing water and the anguished cries of Crowpaw and Stormfur himself, that she would never let it get that far.

And, much later, there's a certain tabby she-cat, and a certain ginger tom, and Tawnypelt is content with the way that things turn out.

They'll never be the same, constantly changing like a river's course over moons of time. But Tawnypelt took pride in the fact that she never drowned.

And that she was not too afraid to name her son after her father.


	3. Hidden Faces

**Only the Young are Good**

Hidden Faces

_Squirrelkit's haunches wriggled as she stalked_ her prey, a juicy mouse (a white and tortoiseshell tail). She slowly moved forwards, the mouse totally unaware of what was coming. Just one more second...and..._pounce!_ Sorrelpaw yelped as her tail fell victim to Squirrelkit's attack.

"Squirrelkit, what do you think you're doing?" Sorrelpaw meowed, pulling her tail out of the kit's grasp and thrashing it behind her.

"Hunting for the elder's." Squirrelkit said smartly, sitting up straight.

"Oh really? And how much do you really think they're going to enjoy eating _cat tail_?"

Letting out a small sigh, Squirrelkit repied, "Sorry, but I just can't wait to be a warrior!"

Brambleclaw, walking nearby and having heard part of their conversation, snorted and mewed, "Well, that's a long way off yet. And I doubt you'll please the elders with cat meat as fresh-kill."

"Yes, O High and Mighty Warrior, whatever you say." Squirrelkit stuck out her tongue at the dark tabby warrior; the tom just replied with shaking his head as he walked away, the tiny ginger kit rapidly switching the topic of her conversation. "I hope I get great mentors like you, Sorrelpaw!"

Mentors, plural, as the tortoiseshell's ordinary mentor was currently in the nursery napping. Until Squirrelkit was apprenticed, Mousefur had taken over Sorrelpaw's training for Sandstorm. Sorrelpaw let out a small purr. "Not everybody gets two mentors, you know." Squirrelkit shuffled her paws, making her friend purr again. "Let me guess, you're hoping for a she-cat mentor so that there's the possibility of kits?"

"Well, wouldn't it be awesome! I mean, then I could learn lots of different things and be an even better warrior!"

Sorrelpaw meowed gently, "Yes, but that will still be for a while. You're only four moons old, Squirrelkit." Sorrelpaw sighed as Squirrelkit's attention was grabbed by something behind Sorrelpaw. She doubted that the kit had heard a word she'd said.

Squirrelkit crouched down for a split second before jumping up and landing heavily on top of a small tabby kit. She sqealed in surprise, and, unable to throw off the slightly bigger body on top of her, meowed indignantly, "Squirrelkit, get off of me!"

Squirrelkit leaped off promptly. "Sorry, Leafkit, but I was just practicing for if ShadowClan ever attacks." Squirrelkit then crouched down and growled (un)menacingly, showing off her tiny, thorn-sharp teeth. Her sister just shook her head. Sorrelpaw, was stifling in a laugh. She let out a small snort, causing Squirrelkit to turn to her. "Are you_ laughing_ at me?"

Sorrelpaw took one look at her face and couldn't hold in her laughter anymore. Squirrelkit took this as a yes. "I'll show you!" she called out, tackling the apprentice.

Leafkit settled down on the soft ground, watching the familiar sight unfold before her. Sorrelpaw let Squirrelkit get in quite a few hits before finally flipping the ginger kit over and holding her down with one paw on her chest. "And now," Sorrelpaw mewed, "ShadowClan has taken over ThunderClan. Nice defensive skills, Squirrelkit."

"What!" Squirrelkit squacked. "You're working with ShadowClan? You're betraying ThunderClan?"

Sorrelpaw gave a _mrrow_ of amusement. "Silly, I'm just pretending!"

Still scrabbling under her friend's paw, Squirrelkit turned her head to her sister and asked, "What do you think, Leafkit? Is she _actually_ pretending? Or is she just waiting to let those foxhearts into our camp!" Not waiting for a reply from the slight tabby patiently waiting beside her and went on. "Well, if she does, I'll be ready!"

"Er, Squirrelkit, I don't think you will be. She beat you down with a single paw." Leafkit pointed out.

"Well then, I'll go tell Firestar that I need to start training then!" Sorrelpaw finally lifted her paw off of her friend's chest; Squirrelkit stood up with as much dignity and grace that she could manage after it felt like she'd been ground into the grass. She shook the dirt off her pelt, ready to set off and find her father till a voice stopped her dead in her tracks.

"You will do no such thing." The voice was calm, smooth, and (if you listened really hard) amused.

"Sandstorm." Squirrelkit squeaked, turning to see her mother at the entry of the nursery.

"It is definately time for your nap. Come, into the nursery." Sandstorm beckoned with her tail to her kits.

"But, Sandstorm, Sorrelpaw was going to-!"

"Sorrelpaw!" Mousefur stood at the entrance to the camp, waving her tail. "We're going hunting with Brambleclaw!"

"Bye Squirrelkit, Sandstorm, Leafkit!" Sorrelpaw called over her shoulder as she ran off to join them. And with that, Squirrelkit sighed. There was no way she was getting out of her nap now.

"Have fun with the Mighty Warrior." she muttered rebelliously before trailing into the nursery after her mother and sister.

* * *

><p>When Squirrelkit woke up from her nap, her sister and mother were both gone. As was Ferncloud and her kits. And Goldenflower. Which made the entire nursery empty. Where was everybody? She could hear voices outside.<p>

Pushing herself out of the nursery, Squirrelkit looked around the clearing, noting that many cats had worried faces and her father was on the Highrock. Finally finding her mother next to a distraught Mousefur and Goldenflower, she ran over to sit by her.

"What's going on?" Squirrelkit hissed loudly. Dustpelt cast her a sharp look, and the seriousness of the situation hit Squirrelkit like a rock. But, since nobody would tell her what was going on, she'd have to find out for herself.

(Of course, the thought never occured to tiny Squirrelkit just to listen to what her father was saying. But, being a kit, and being _Squirrelkit_, she couldn't really be expected to sit still and listen for that long.)

Looking around at the gathered Clan, Squirrelkit noticed that pretty much every cat was gathered, except for those on patrol. And Sorrelpaw. _She's out hunting._ Alone? Brambleclaw was sitting next to Cloudtail, and Mousefur was right here, looking as if she was in shock...

Squirrelkit gasped. Glancing around, she saw that the meeting had ended, and her Clanmates seemed to be going back to their duties. _Now!_ Squirrelkit began running towards the medicine cat den, bursting through the ferns to a horrifying sight that she wouldn't forget for a long time.

Picture it: Sorrelpaw was lying in a makeshift nest, her face grimaced in pain. Leafkit (_Leafkit?_) was pushing moss around her. And Cinderpelt was dressing the bloody wound on Sorrelpaw's leg.

Leafkit's face was arranged into a perfectly normal pose, probably not to freak out Sorrelpaw, but if anybody knew Leafkit's face, it was Squirrelkit and Sorrelpaw. And they could both tell that she wasn't as calm as she looked.

Cinderpelt, however, was as calm and steady as a rock. Her face gave nothing away at all, and Squirrelkit couldn't tell if she was concerned or not.

Sorrelpaw was the worst. In the few quiet seconds in between Cinderpelt's herbs, the injured apprentice would compose her face, trying to hide the pain. Then Cinderpelt would get back to work and she'd be grinding her teeth, holding in a yowl that Squirrelkit knew was right at the edge of Sorrelpaw's tongue. Squirrelkit couldn't bear to see her best friend in so much pain.

"What happened?" she finally gasped out after minutes of just standing there. Leafkit scrambled to her feet, running over to her sister.

"Sorrelpaw was hunting." Leafkit whispered. "She chased a squirrel right onto the Thunderpath when a monster was going past." Squirrelkit felt her stomach drop. Leafkit must have felt it too, because she rushed to assure her. "She'll be fine, it's okay. It just grazed her shoulder. She'll still be a warrior." Leafkit paused for a second, then continued. "Brambleclaw said that we should've seen the squirrel."

Squirrelkit knew that her sister was trying to lighten to mood, but she just couldn't stop staring at her friend's face. She was in so much pain, and she was putting so much effort into hiding it.

Squirrelkit had a feeling deep inside her that things would never be the same.

* * *

><p>"Squirrelkit, from this moment, you will be known as Squirrelpaw." Squirrelpaw wriggled her paws around in excitement. She was finally an apprentice! And now she would get her very own mentor.<p>

"Dustpelt, you trained Ashfur well, and you are ready for another apprentice." _Dustpelt?_ But...but he couldn't...oh well. "I am sure that you'll be able to teach and train Squirrelpaw to be a worthy warrior of ThunderClan." Squirrelpaw looked up to see her new mentor stepping forward. Knowing what was expected, she walked forwards to stand next to Dustpelt and reached up to touch noses with him.

"Squirrelpaw!" Leafpaw called out, her eyes full of pride, the connection bringing Squirrelpaw feelings that she had felt for her sister not too long ago. It was like looking into a pool and seeing your reflection...well, feeling your reflection, or, er, never mind.

"Squirrelpaw! Squirrelpaw!" The rest of the Clan took up the call, and as they did, Squirrelpaw couldn't help but look around the clearing, wishing with all her heart that a certain tortoiseshell and white she-cat could be here to watch her on one of the most anticipated days in a warrior's life.

Once the Clan had left the clearing and gone their seperate ways, Dustpelt padded over to her. "So, are you ready to see ThunderClan's territory?"

"Er, actually, I was wondering if I could visit Sorrelpaw first...if that's okay?" Squirrelpaw finished on a squeak, almost too scared to look her mentor in the face. _Almost._

Dustpelt sighed. "I can't say that I'm surprised." Squirrelpaw shuffled awkwardly. "Well, alright then, go on."

"Thank you!" Squirrelpaw mewed excitedly. Running into the medicine cat den, Squirrelpaw was quite unsurprised to see her sister there, listening intently to her mentor, Cinderpelt. Squirrelpaw guessed she should've known that her sister would never be a warrior. She'd never play-fought with her and Spiderkit or Shrewkit, or Sorrelpaw, and she'd loved spending time in the medicine den.

Looking around, she saw Sorrelpaw in her nest among the ferns. She plopped down next to her friend, excited beyond words. Since Sorrelpaw's accident two moons ago, Squirrelpaw and Sorrelpaw hadn't been as close as they used to, but Squirrelpaw wasn't worried. She still saw her friend every day, and it wasn't like that was going to change anytime soon, right?

* * *

><p>Squirrelpaw unfurled in her nest, woken up by Rainpaw and Sootpaw scrabbling out of the apprentice's den. It was just past sunhigh, and time for their warriors ceremony. Stretching out her legs, she followed her denmates out to the clearing. The two brothers went to stand next to their mentors, Cloudtail and Thornclaw near the centre of the clearing. Squirrelpaw herself went to sit next to her mother, both she-cats watching intently as Firestar conducted the ceremony.<p>

As the last few cats gathered around for the ceremony, Firestar jumped down for the Highrock form where he had issued the command to gather (which Squirrelpaw had missed since she'd been napping), and turned to Cloudtail. "Cloudtail, are you satisfied that your apprentice is ready to become a full warrior of ThunderClan?"

"Absolutely, Firestar." Cloudtail confirmed. After asking the same of Thornclaw, Firestar tilted his head back to look at the invisible warriors of StarClan.

"I, Firestar, leader of ThunderClan, call upon my warrior ancestors to look down on these apprentices." Sootpaw's tail twitched, and Rainpaw took in a quick breath. "They have trained hard to understand the ways of your noble code, and I commend them to you as warriors in their turn." Firestar turned his head to the apprentices before him, his gaze serious and solemn. "Do you, Rainpaw and Sootpaw, promise to uphold the warrior code and to protect and defend this Clan, even at the cost of your lives?"

Almost in perfect unison, the brothers meowed, "I do."

Firestar nodded almost imperceptibly. "Then by the powers of StarClan, I give you your warrior name. Sootpaw, from this moment on, you will be known as Sootfur. StarClan honours your bravery and your strength, and we welcome you as a full warrior of ThunderClan." Padding forward, the ThunderClan leader rested his head on top of Sootfur's, letting Sootfur lick his shoulder.

Then, turning to Rainpaw, he repeated the ceremonial words. "Rainpaw, from this moment on, you will be known as Rainwhisker. StarClan honours your perserverance and your faith, and we welcome you as a full warrior of ThunderClan."

Once Rainwhisker had stepped away from Firestar, the whole Clan burst into cheers and calls, being noticably led by the new warriors' sister. Sorrelpaw was sitting at the entrance to the medicine cat den. Once the Clan had taken up her call, she stopped, leaning back on her legs and watching as her brothers were surrounded by the rest of the Clan. Squirrelpaw stayed where she was too, looking carefully at her friend from across the clearing.

Sorrelpaw's face was composed into a picture of perfection, her eyes gleaming with pride for her brothers. But...there was something else in her eyes. And Squirrelpaw couldn't name it. Did she not know her friend as well as she thought?

* * *

><p>Sorrelpaw limped carefully back into the<em> medicine den, curling up into her nest, resigned. Her brothers would watch over the Clan tonight. She and her littermates had talked about how they couldn't wait for that night, having just recieved their names and letting the whole Clan rely on them, just them, for one night. Sorrelpaw sighed. She guessed it would be just her alone if she - <em>when_ she became a warrior. _

_She knew that if she had asked, her brothers' would've waited for her so they could all become warriors together. But Sorrelpaw knew that they had been holding off for a moon anyways. So, after Squirrelpaw had become an apprentice and gone off with Dustpelt, she'd dragged herself out of her nest and found Firestar. _

_"Yes, Sorrelpaw, is something wrong?" Firestar had asked. _

_Sorrelpaw inhaled. She knew she didn't have to do this. Her brothers were totally fine with waiting. But she knew that that wouldn't be right. "I want my brothers' to become warriors. I know they've asked to wait, but they don't deserve that, just because a dumb Twoleg monster and a dumb apprentice got tangled up together."_

_Firestar had been surprised - he hadn't realized that she'd known her brothers were stalling for her. But he had come through. And now Sorrelpaw wasn't sure if she regretted it._

_Oh, well. It wasn't bad that she felt jealous, right? Did that make her a bad cat if she was? __She knew that Squirrelpaw had been watching her at the ceremony. Had her young friend noticed her jealousy? Or her regret? Even, amybe, her...no. She didn't hate her brothers, didn't resent them. At least, she hoped not. _

_Although Squirrelpaw might not notice her raging feelings, her gentle sister might. Leafpaw was very attentive, and Sorrelpaw spent a lot more time with the medicine cat apprentice nowadays. She'd have to watch herself carefully for a few days, until all the confusing feelings went away and she'd be sure nobody would notice. And all that required was a bit of hiding._

* * *

><p>Squirrelpaw wriggled around. Brambleclaw had gone to sleep long ago. But she couldn't stand it, not with all her excitement just flying around inside of her. And guilt. And worry. Although the worry wasn't hers. It was Leafpaw's. Her sister could sense her excitement, and knew that she wasn't in camp. Squirrelpaw felt guilty that she couldn't explain herself to Leafpaw, but she just hoped that she wouldn't give her and Brambleclaw away.<p>

Squirrelpaw snorted quietly. _Brambleclaw._ She couldn't believe that of all the cats in ThunderClan, she would be travelling with Brambleclaw. He had always been an arrogant furball, and never really gotten along with her, ever since she was a kit. But Squirrelpaw could almost feel the fear of the unknown drifting off of him in waves. Maybe this would humble him a bit.

Plus, for the last little while, Firestar had seemed to be bending backwards just to keep her and the tabby warrior apart. For a split second, Squirrelpaw felt guilty, but then it disappeared. That had been Leafpaw. What was she hiding? She knew her sister hadn't been herself for the last little while, and that had started...around the same time Firestar had started being angry with her and Brambleclaw!

Squirrelpaw dropped her head to her paws. A wave of weariness rolled over her, signalling to her that her sister was asleep. So maybe it had been her own guilt for leaving her father without making up? But, no, that didn't make sense. She had no reason to regret anything to do with her father.

After she had exhausted every last thought of her family members, her denmates and her mentor, the last thing she thought before falling asleep was of Sorreltail.

Another pang of guilt twinged in her chest. Even after Sorreltail had left the medicine cat's den, her and Squirrelpaw hadn't really reconnected. On some days, it even seemed like she was closer to Leafpaw then anybody else. And Squirrelpaw had grown pretty close Shrewpaw. So, maybe she shouldn't feel guilty. But she kind of wished she could've said goodbye.

* * *

><p><em>Squirrelpaw curled up next to her<em> sister, struggling to get comfortable on the rough stone of Sunningrocks. It was hard, but it didn't matter. She couldn't stop purring. Her sister was back, she and Brambleclaw were back, and everything could go back to normal.

Except that it couldn't go back to normal. Squirrelpaw sighed, then purred again when Leafpaw shoved her nose into her fur, comforting her. Squirrelpaw had missed this, being able to be so close to her sister. It had been so long, and so many things were different, but she still had her sister.

Squirrelpaw watched as the sky grew darker and darker, and saw that it was a new moon, the only light coming from Silverpelt. _Where are you?_ Squirrelpaw asked her warrior ancestors silently. She knew from her sister that there had been no word from StarClan, and the medicine cats had almost given up hope. Looking down, she stared at Leafpaw's pretty coat, admiring how it looked black and white in the almost complete darkness.

Knowing that she wouldn't be falling asleep for a while, she let her mind drift through the memories of the day. Shrewpaw not really believing her, but her old friend (Leafpaw's new friend) having faith in her, wanting desperately to make it up to her best friend _(Leafpaw_). She'd felt a tiny string of jealousy, she had to admit. But who was she jealous of? Her sister, or Sorreltail?

Both, if she was honest. She just couldn't figure out what had happened. She had been best friends with Sorreltail, playing with her almost everyday, almost like a surrogate sister since Leafpaw had always spent her time in the medicine cat den. Which was where Sorreltail ended up staying for quite some time. But, even beside all of that...Squirrelpaw still felt as though she had turned around for one instant (okay, maybe a few moons) and when she looked, it was like her sister and her friend hadn't even missed her.

They were getting along just fine without her.

(But then again, wasn't she getting along just fine without _them_?)

* * *

><p><strong>I know I haven't done Author's Notes before, but I thought I should because this one's a little different from the first two. Still two main characters, but in this one-shot, they both get a little POV time...yeah, I don't like it very much, but I felt like I should.<strong>

**Anyways, I wanted to thank people for reading, favouriting, and subscribing this, and especially to Nightkill for reviewing. It's greatly appreciated!**

**So, I was hoping that everybody else would review too. :D It'd be nice to know what you all think of this random idea I came up with once upon a time.**

**Oh! Also, if I did one of Ravenpaw, who would you want the second character to be?**


	4. Over Pain

**Only the Young are Good**

Over Pain

Every cat knew every cat in ThunderClan. They were Clanmates - how could they not know each other?

And every cat knew Firestar's daughters, Squirrelpaw and Leafpaw. They were the leader's children, for StarClan's sake!

And even more than that, no cat couldn't _not_ know Leafpaw - she was the medicine cat apprentice.

But the first time that Mousefur really had contact with the gentle little tabby was in the midst of so much pain - the destruction of the forest, the mystery of missing cats, the disappearance of prey, and even the death of Clanmates. And Mousefur had jumped right into the middle of it.

* * *

><p>"What are you doing here?" Mousefur spat, swallowing thickly.<p>

The she-cat in front of her flinched, the pain in her eyes unmistakable. "I'm bringing you your tansy."

"I thought you weren't the medicine cat anymore." Mousefur shot back. "I thought _your son_ was taking your place."

Leafpool dropped her head. "He is. I'm going to the warrior's den tonight."

"Then what are you here for?" Mousefur finished her question with a cough.

Just then, Purdy sat up in his nest, blinking the sleep out of his eyes. "Eh? What's goin' on?" Leafpool glanced up at the old tom.

Mousefur drew her jowls back, showing her teeth. "Nothing except that this cat had_ kits_. With a WindClan warrior." Mousefur didn't avert her gaze from the tabby in front of her, who flinched again.

Purdy didn't get it. "What're you goin' on about, Mousefur? How was the Gathering, Leafpool?" Purdy turned to the young cat. Leafpool returned his friendly gaze, unable to answer, but her eyes giving away her pain.

"Don't bother asking her! She'll probably lie about it! How are we to tell when she's telling the truth and when she's not?"

Longtail walked over to the front of the den from his nest. "Purdy, why don't you go back to sleep? I'm sure you'll hear all about the Gathering tomorrow." The blind tabby's voice was soothing and calm as he directed his disgruntled and confused denmate back to his nest.

"Not that there's any point. It already _is_ tomorrow, practically!" Mousefur knew that Purdy was right. Dawn wasn't far off.

Longtail returned to Mousefur's staring contest, nodding to Leafpool, his gaze directed somewhere over the young she-cat's shoulders. "Hello, Leafpool." Mousefur could barely stand it. How could he be so calm around this...this traitor? Mousefur coughed quietly.

"Hi, Longtail. How are you?" Leafpool sounded miserable.

"Better than you're doing at the moment, if I understand correctly."

Leafpool nodded slowly, her eyes boring holes into the herbs she'd brought. "I...I just came to bring Mousefur her tansy. Her cough's almost gone, but she'll probably still need a dose or two." Mousefur refused to cough now, in front of her. But then coughing was suddenly all she could think about. And she had to cough _so badly_. But she couldn't. Wouldn't.

"All right, well, if you want, you can just leave these herbs with me, and I'll make sure that Mousefur eats them." Unable to open her mouth for fear of coughing, she settled with glaring at her denmate, regardless of his sight (or lack of).

"Thank you, Longtail." And with that, Leafpool padded away without another word. Mousefur waited until she was out of earshot, then began coughing. It was loud, long, and harsh, hacking and grating at her throat.

Finally, she got her breath back. "Longtail, I-"

"You might want these. " Longtail interupted smoothly, pushing the tansy over to her with his paw, his eyes looking off into the dark distance. Mousefur glared at him again, hating how he could do that, act like he could see when he couldn't. She also hated it when he was right.

Mousefur bent over the small pile of herbs, chewing and swallowing them, then settling back to wait for the healing juices to seep into her, to take away the pain that was rasping against her throat.

* * *

><p>Firestar. "...happened? Who did..." <em>Don't yell, don't scream<em>.

Graystripe, next to her, angry. Spitting, scared. _Oh, it _hurts...

Leafpaw. Sweet, small. Concerned. "...see Cinderpelt."

Leafpaw, helping. Doesn't, not really. Thankful for trying. _So tired...stupid Twolegs..._

Graystripe, talking again. "...Twolegs..."

Firestar, angry now. "...have always ignored us."

"Not anymore." _That's for sure_.

"At least I gave him a few scratches to remember me by." _Ugh_. Not talking anymore. Not worth it.

_It hurts more now..._Leafpaw's fetching Cinderpelt. Fed up? Hopeless? _No. There has to be hope._

"Come and lie...a look." Legs collapsed, lying down now. _That helps a bit._

Cinderpelt sniffed her flopping, useless, _painful,_ leg. "It's dislocated... I can put it right...Leafpaw..." Her vision flickered. Couldn't even hear Cinderpelt...knew it was going to hurt anyways.

Poppy seeds. _Thank you, Leafpaw._ Licked them up, then lay back.

Leafpaw braced her good leg...was getting drowsy..._Ow!_

"Excellent..." Cinderpelt, faint. "...put your weight on it." _What?_ Stood up, staggered.

Let herself be guided to the ferns, flopping down onto the plants, and...

* * *

><p>Mousefur had the strangest dream.<p>

She had hurt herself, see. Or rather, a Twoleg had hurt her, by scratching her leg. And after Leafpaw healed her up (by breathing on her), the small apprentice stared at her before meowing, "Twolegs are the funniest little mousebrains. But don't worry, I'm going to go find them."

"What?" Mousefur asked, but she was too late. The apprentice had already flown away. In search of Twolegs.

And she never came back.

* * *

><p>Looking back, Mousefur hated the exact moment that she woke up. Because, as crazy as her dream had been, (Mousefur had always hated herbs, they tended to do funny things to her) it had a grain of truth to it. Leafpaw was gone.<p>

Impatient to get out of camp, to just get away from reality, and pretend that this just _wasn't happening, _Mousefur had run a little too fast on patrol and pulled a muscle in her injured leg, making her have to stay in the medicine cat's den for a few days. And so she got a perfect view of Cinderpelt's face every day.

And every day, the gray she-cat was dieing a little more inside. She was in so much pain that she was trying so hard to hide.

Mousefur hated Twolegs. She cursed them with every breath.

* * *

><p>She was just as thankful as the next cat when they brought Leafpaw and the others home. Maybe even more so, since she'd always kind of considered herself responsible for the apprentice's disappearance.<p>

But she was just as wary of Leafpool as the next cat after Cinderpelt died. Maybe even more so, because Mousefur couldn't understand for the life of her why the young tabby had done what she did.

She knew that she had to get over it, calm down, and accept what had happened as the past.

And she did.

So she couldn't believe the shot of anger she felt towards her _medicine cat_ after Berrynose came and told her and Longtail what had happened at the Gathering.

There were no words to describe it, to explain what she was feeling. It just...hurt.

There was one question that she wanted to ask her so badly, but she knew that she never would.

_Why?_

* * *

><p>Time went on.<p>

And, to Mousefur, it didn't matter that they were Clanmates.

Who cared if she was Firestar's daughter?

And, for StarClan's sake, she wasn't the medicine cat anymore!

Mousefur had no reason to have any contact with the warrior Leafpool.

So, she didn't.

* * *

><p><strong>Hello, invisible people! Sorry that I haven't updated in a while. So...I've had this one done for...uhm, never mind. And I am almost done the one with Ravenpaw. (yay!)<strong>

**Please, take a quick moment to review! It really makes my day and improves my writing! I want to know what you think! Did you like this one? 'Cause I did. :)**


	5. Fighting Fire

**Only the Young are Good**

Fighting Fire

_Ravenpaw was exhausted. He huffed and_ puffed, running over the peak of the ravine to catch up. Tigerclaw, standing at the top of the bluff, looked back quickly. "You'd better not keep me waiting, _apprentice._"

Redtail flicked the tabby's shoulder with his tail as he trotted past. "Don't be too hard on him. It's his first day out." Tigerclaw snorted and padded on with the deputy.

"It doesn't matter what Redtail says, Tigerclaw's still right. You'd better keep up." Dustpaw shoved Ravenpaw out of the way with his shoulder before running past to catch up with their mentors.

Ravenpaw caught his balance before running on. If this was what being an apprentice was like, he wasn't looking forward to going back to camp and disappointing Graykit! He really wished that he could just get back to camp and curl up with Speckletail in the nursery...but he had a new den now, didn't he? A new life.

Everything was different now, and he'd better get used to it fast, 'cause this was what life would be like from now on.

* * *

><p>Ravenpaw never knew that a kit could bounce up and down so much. It just didn't look...natural.<p>

"Huh? Well? Didya? Didya?" Graykit bounded passed Ravenpaw for the twelfth time.

"Graykit, we went on a border patrol, and then I collected some moss. So, no, I did not hunt down ShadowClan enemies. Would you let me eat in peace now?"

"But, why? It's so exciting, you being an apprentice! I just wish that -"

"Graykit! Stop harassing Ravenpaw! It's time for you to be getting to sleep!" Willowpelt called from outside the nursery, where she was eating with a very pregnant Frostfur.

The little tom sighed. "But it's not even sundown yet!"

Willowpelt padded over to the apprentice's tree stump. "No, but you didn't have a nap today, so you need your rest. Dont worry, Ravenpaw's not going anywhere."

Graykit grudgingly followed his mother back to the nursery. "But it's not the same." Ravenpaw felt an unexplainable chill run down his back at the kit's words. _It's not the same..._ "And I want to be an apprentice too!"

Ravenpaw felt the moment break, and the fur on his back settled. At that moment, the hunting patrol returned. Ravenpaw sighed in relief. The pidgeon he was eating now had been the last thing on the fresh-kill pile, and Tigerclaw had not liked the idea of him taking it. Now that there was more food, perhaps he wouldn't mind so much.

Tigerclaw stalked past, making Ravenpaw nearly jump out of his pelt. "We'll be doing battle training tomorrow. Be ready." He growled before leaving just as quickly as he'd come. Ravenpaw waited till the fur on the back of his neck went flat before moving again. Why did his mentor scare him so much? He was pretty sure it wasn't a normal thing. Sandpaw wasn't scared of Whitestorm - he could tell from the way that they almost seemed like littermates the way they squabbled so much. And Dustpaw didn't have fear in his eyes when he looked at Redtail. That was respect for the formidable deputy.

So why was Ravenpaw different?

* * *

><p><em>"Did you see anything?" <em>Ravenpaw's ears burned. "Tell me! Now! Did you?" They were pressed flat against his head, trying to lighten the brute force of the words being thrown at him.

"N-no. At l- I- no. I..." Ravenpaw thought that that if he shook anymore, his legs might fall off.

A harsh laugh. "You're useless. I don't know why Bluestar even bothered making you an apprentice." Hot breath fell heavily on Ravenpaw's muzzle. He couldn't help the fur that was rising on his neck. "Oh, and just in case you _did _see something that you just happen to not remember right now..." The barely veiled threat made the small black tom want to curl up in the nursery, or to run away and never come back, or...

Or wish that Bluestar hadn't given him Tigerclaw for his mentor.

"Come on. We're going back to camp. They'll be worried about the tiny, _pathetic_ apprentice who barely survived his first battle." The broad tabby tom turned, stalking away through the trees, his claws digging deep into the loam as he quickly spun back, coming nose to nose with the Ravenpaw. "And you'd better _stay out of my way_ from now on." Then, just as Ravenpaw thought his eyes were going to roll into the back of his head, his mentor disappeared, the tip of his tail whisking away the only hint as to where he'd gone.

Running to catch up with Tigerclaw, Ravenpaw quickly ran out of breath. His legs were going to fall off, he was sure of it. But he had to get back to camp, at least close to the same time that Tigerclaw did. Because if he didn't...

His only comfort...never mind. There was no ending to that sentence. Yeah, he loved his mother, and his friends made him smile, and he loved and respected the code and his Clan. But if he was truthful, the bad overshadowed the good by a long shot. He didn't have anything to comfort himself with.

If only he had gone back to the camp when he was supposed to. Before that battle, the good in his life had been winning. That battle had changed so much.

The only bad things before had been that his denmates seemed to find him hilarious (in a cruel, sadistic way) and that his mentor was a little scary.

Now, he didn't know what he was going to do. Tigerclaw was a lot more than just 'scary'.

* * *

><p>Firepaw was <em>nice. <em>Not _nice_, like a nursery mother, so caring that it just might be the death of you. And not _nice,_ like Graypaw, who was his friend, but...that was it. Firepaw...understood. Not 'understood Ravenpaw', but 'understood why Ravenpaw was the way he was'.

It was a good change, and Ravenpaw had felt the balance between the good and the bad shift a little. Not very much, but enough that Ravenpaw didn't think that he'd go insane from the weight of it all. But he was pretty sure that bad was going to be at the top for the rest of his life. He honestly thought that that was never going to change.

It didn't sink in to Ravenpaw for a while. But he finally realized that having Firepaw in the Clan didn't make the slightest difference at all. It didn't change the fact that he knew about that battle, and that until Tigerclaw was deputy or dead, his apprentice wasn't going to be safe. He felt like finding himself a nice badger set, either empty to hide himself in it, or badger-infested, to, well...as long as it got him away from all of the things going on in his Clan.

In a word, he was miserable.

He finally realized, that until Tigerclaw got what he wanted, he wasn't on Firepaw's side. He had to be on Tigerclaw's.

He would have to fight fire.

* * *

><p>"Fur was flying everywhere. Blood spattered the leaves of the bramble bushes, bright red against green..." Ravenpaw slipped into his own memories, letting his mind take him back to the battle. He was shivering, but it wasn't cold. The sun was out, hardly a cloud to be seen. Whitestorm disappeared in front of him, off to help the next cat. He'd just saved Ravenpaw from being slashed up himself.<p>

Just as Ravenpaw was about to follow him - Tigerclaw would be angry if he found out that he hadn't fought during his first battle - a horrible scream ripped through the air as the ground shook, as if StarClan was fighting in the battle themselves. Ravenpaw couldn't help but wonder who they would help, ThunderClan or RiverClan? Redtail burst out of the dust floating through the air, tail quivering and mouth dripping blood.

"Oakheart is dead!" Redtail yowled, gasping for air before running to Tigerclaw to help him fight off yet another huge RiverClan warrior. Together they pushed back the warrior until Redtail saw his chance and took it. He grabbed the RiverClan warrior's tail in his mouth, dragging him to the bushes before letting him go crying like a kit back to his own territory.

Tigerclaw flicked Redtail's shoulder as Redtail yowled out their victory. The remaining RiverClan cats took that as their cue, running off to the edge of the bank before swimming as fast as they could. The ThunderClan cats slowly regrouped, getting ready to head back to the camp, when -

A yowl interrupted his racing thoughts. It was time for the Gathering to start, and just in time. Ravenpaw looked up to see Tigerclaw's eyes, full of fiery anger, burning into his pelt. What had he just done?

* * *

><p>Ravenpaw stumbled towards the warrior's den, wishing with all his heart, once again, that he had just left Sunningrocks with everybody else that day. Or at least kept his mouth shut at the Gathering. Now, as much as he wanted to be running in the opposite direction, Tigerclaw's furious, burning gaze was drawing Ravenpaw towards him.<p>

"Well, my apprentice, I trust you enjoyed yourself at the Gathering." Tigerclaw's words dripped from his mouth, making them sound angry, poisonous and sweet all at once.

Unable to think of an answer, Ravenpaw stuttered out a few unintelligible half-words.

"You're a worthless scrap of fur. A waste of space. I would think that, knowing that, you might have a little self-preservation, a wish to prove yourself. A desire to stay alive. But after your actions tonight, it's obvious to me you don't care." Tigerclaw spoke quietly, so as to not attract attention, and with each word, he brought his face closer to Ravenpaw's. "You might want to think carefully about what would happen to you if someone found out how little you cared about your own life. And then you might want to _think about what you say_ before the words leave your mouth." Ravenpaw felt his ears press against his head, smelled the fear-scent slowly drifting off of him and wanted to scream, because he knew that Tigerclaw was probably enjoying it.

"_Get out of my sight."_ he growled deeply, his words barely understandable through it. Ravenpaw rushed away towards the tree stump, hoping against hope that when he fell asleep, he just wouldn't wake up.

* * *

><p><em>It was only getting worse as<em> time went on. Tigerclaw kept on threatening him, no matter what he did. Firepaw kept on digging deeper, no matter what he said, and slowly, almost imperceptibly, he noticed as the rest of the Clan grew less attached to him. He was worthless, he knew that. And Tigerclaw was doing his best to push it beyond that. He was trying to make him into a cat that no one would want to associate with, someone who would be considered a traitor.

He hated his stupid impulses sometimes. If only he hadn't stayed, if only he hadn't seen what he'd seen...

The bad was looming over him again. Firepaw had helped, but now Ravenpaw was putting so much effort into pushing his friend away, and it wasn't helping his inner battle.

There was something else. Tigerclaw had seemed off the past half moon. Ravenpaw didn't know what it was, didn't really want to _know_ what it was, but it was too late for that.

Because that was when ShadowClan attacked. It was horrible. They'd just gotten back from an exhausting journey involving a loner, rats, Bluestar losing a life, and Tigerclaw looking..._scared?_

Jumping into the mass of writhing bodies in front of him was terrifying. But he did it. He didn't care if Tigerclaw was going to kill him, or push him further and further out of the Clan for messing with his plan (because this was definitely his plan), but something was driving him.

He ran past Mousefur, who was bravely holding her own against an orange tabby, and was too busy to see the huge tom lurking behind her. Ravenpaw threw himself at the warrior, knowing there was no way in StarClan that he'd be able to beat the ShadowClan cat, but he had to make sure that Mousefur didn't pay with her life in this battle. _I can't believe that Tigerclaw is doing this._ Ravenpaw thought as he pounced on the warrior's back. The brown tom growled with annoyance before shaking his back and throwing Ravenpaw across the clearing. Enraged, the warrior stalked after the apprentice. That was when Ravenpaw realized the downside of his plan. He had saved Mousefur - but who would save him?

_Never mind, I _can_ believe that he's doing this. Of course he would do this._ The brown tom took his time getting to Ravenpaw, step by step, coming closer. Ravenpaw stepped back each time the warrior got closer, but eventually he had to stop after he'd slipped in a puddle of mud, made from the dirt of the camp's ground mixing with some cat's blood. If he went any farther, he'd fall in it completely and get himself covered in the sickening stuff.

Another step closer. The ShadowClan warrior opened his mouth, breathing heavily, and ugly gleam in his eyes, giving away his anticipation at what he was about to do. Ravenpaw shivered. Time slowed down. The tom raised his foot, ready to take another step closer to Ravenpaw, another step closer to ending a tiny apprentice's life. Then, Darkstripe came rolling towards him, tangled up with a ShadowClan queen. They rolled right in front of the tom just as he put his foot down, stepping heavily on the the little tabby's leg. The crunch was horrid, like a huge limb breaking from its tree. And somehow, Ravenpaw could hear it over all the yowling and hissing and cries of pain throughout the clearing.

"Flowerheart! I'm sorry!" Time returned to normal, and the brown tom totally forgot the battle, crouching next to his Clanmate lying on the ground. Ravenpaw thought he would puke. Was that _bone_ sticking out of her fur?

Darkstripe pulled himself up off the ground, shaking off the dirt and mud from his pelt before turning to the two ShadowClan cats. "This is your chance. Get out of our territory, and don't come back." The glare he gave them was almost Tigerclaw-worthy, so Ravenpaw understood as the tom scrambled to help the tabby onto her (three) feet and be her crutch as she hobbled out of the clearing as fast as she could. Darkstripe looked around, found himself a fight, and leaped off without a single word to help Whitestorm. Ravenpaw jerked back to life, realizing that he should probably do the same.

He did a quick view of his Clan's camp, taking everything in in flashes. Yellowfang, Firepaw and Blackfoot by the nursery, Bluestar by her den, biting a warrior so fiercely that he was sure his back would be scarred for seasons, the queens fighting off an ugly looking ShadowClan warrior helped by a snarling she-cat, Tigerclaw pulling a queen off of Dustpaw as Sandpaw hung onto the she-cat's tail. And Graypaw, being cornered by a huge black tom. Leaping into action, he slashed at the tom's flank before running around to his front to join Graypaw.

That was a mistake. The tom was then able to corner them both. Just as he had them in as small a space as possible and was raising his paw to slice them to bits, Ravenpaw raced under his paw to draw attention away from his thick-furred friend. The tom just moved his paw with Ravenpaw, landing down on his tail, yanking back his whole body. Grunting in pain, he struggled to free his tail from its captor, knowing in his mind that all he was doing was getting it more sliced up.

Graypaw came to his rescue. He leaped up on the black warrior's back, sinking his teeth into the slick fur around his neck. The warrior let out a strangled yelp of pain, before wriggling around like he had ants in his fur. Very painful, very_ big_ ants. Ravenpaw would've found it funny, if not for the circumstances. His tail was making that horrible mud, he knew it, but he forced himself to get up and help his friend. He had to help, had to keep going, he couldn't stop, never stop, don't stop...

All of a sudden, Graypaw was walking away to join Firepaw on the ground beneath the Highrock...what? The battle...it was over. The berry bushes he could hear rustling outside the camp told him just where the last of the ShadowClan warriors were. What had happened? He'd totally zoned out, and he wasn't standing in the same place as before. He had a couple more scratches than he'd had before, and was Graypaw's ear ripped?

Oh, well. That was that, he guessed. Although he didn't really like the idea of not remembering what he'd done, at least that battle was over.

But it was worse then he could've imagined.

"He's gone!" The anguished cry of a certain gray-haired apprentice rang through the clearing. _No. Nonono, not again, this can't be happening, this can't..._ Ravenpaw made his way over to Graypaw, collapsing next to his friend and the empty shell of the ThunderClan deputy. Cats came and went, but Ravenpaw waited.

And there was Tigerclaw. He groomed Lionheart's fur briefly, ever appearing as the loyal warrior, but his eyes gave him away. They bore into Ravenpaw's, burning with such...anticipation. Malice, calculating thoughtfulness. And a warning. Ravenpaw pressed himself closer to Graypaw for comfort, knowing from the tom's glazed eyes that he was too far gone to notice.

That was all the confirmation that Ravenpaw needed to know that this was the same as before. And he hoped, for the sake of Whitestorm, or Darkstripe, or Mousefur, or whoever else was a candidate for deputy-ship, that Bluestar just chose Tigerclaw. He'd be content, and he wouldn't kill anymore cats. At the same time, Ravenpaw couldn't help but hope that as the sun began to rose, he wouldn't be the deputy's apprentice. Because even the thought of it made him shiver, his tail curl, his whiskers quiver.

The moon rose steadily through the sky, marking the time as it got closer and closer to Bluestar's revelation. As moonhigh approached, Ravenpaw followed Firepaw over to the Highrock, leaving Graypaw with Lionheart. Bluestar climbed up on the big stone as cats got settled, sombre and quiet.

Ravenpaw's pulse began to race in his ears, loud, strong and fast. What had he been thinking before? Of course Tigerclaw couldn't become deputy! It didn't matter how many lives were lost; none could add up to the horrifying image of Tigers_tar_, which would be inevitable if he was made deputy, and would probably lead to a lot more deaths then just a few.

_Thump-thump._

"And it is once more my duty - much, much too soon - to name ThunderClan's new deputy."

_Thump-thump. Th__ump-thump._

"I say these words before the body of Lionheart..."

_Thump-thump. Th__ump-thump. Th__ump-Thump._

"...so that his spirit may hear and approve my choice."

_Thump-thump. Th__ump-thump. Th__ump-thump. Th__ump-thump._

"I have not forgotten how one cat avenged the death of Redtail..."

_Thumpthumpth__umpthump!_

"...and brought his body back to us. ThunderClan needs this fearless loyalty even more now."

_Thump-thump. Th_ump-thump. Th__ump-thump. Th__ump-thump.__

"Tigerclaw will be the new deputy of ThunderClan."

_Thump. Thump._

* * *

><p>Mistakes. Like letting Bluestar even do something as crazy as making Tigerclaw his mentor. Or leaving Sunningrocks when he was supposed to. And letting that mousebrained comment out of his mouth.<p>

_He's wanted to be deputy ever since he took care of Redtail-_

Since when had telling the truth been a problem?

Since Tigerclaw, that's when. With Tigerclaw, it was always easier to lie.

"ShadowClan attacked while we were away from camp." Tigerclaw's gravelly voice filled the clearing, almost pushing the cats out of it. His glare circled the clearing constantly, not noticably staying on any cat. But Ravenpaw could feel his eyes on him, the slow burning of an evil patience. "They chose their moment well. How did they know that the camp was so poorly defended? Do they have eyes inside our camp?" No hiding his gaze now, Tigerclaw stared blatantly at his skinny apprentice. Raavenpaw dropped his eyes to his paws, almost unable to bear it. Now he could feel everybody's eyes on him.

Tigerclaw paused for a moment full of distrust and suspicion before going on. Once he ended the meeting, the Clan broke up into small groups, ready to start the impossible task of returning their camp to normal. Firepaw turned to Ravenpaw, his eyes wide with shock. Was he really so surprised?

"Ravenpaw?" Well, if he didn't understand, Ravenpaw wasn't about to tell him. He was still supposed to fight fire, right? He wasn't about to take as big of a risk as crossing his mentor.

Leaving his friends behind, he wove his skinny body through his Clanmates before finally stopping in front of Halftail and Whitestorm, ready to help rebuild the boundary wall.

Graypaw came to join him after a bit. They worked together in silence. Uneasy for Ravenpaw, unknowingly for Graypaw. The long-haired apprentice was still mourning his mentor. Regardless, Ravenpaw was pretty sure that he was the one who wished the most out of anyone that Lionheart hadn't been killed.

* * *

><p><em>Ravenpaw tried with all his might<em> to keep calm as he followed Graypaw and Tigerclaw up the ravine. The deputy wouldn't do something with other cats around. He'd be just fine, right?

Wrong. Now Graypaw was a long ways away, on the other side of the territory, trying to complete a seemingly impossible task - "Do your part to feed the Clan. Fish." Tigerclaw had said. This was a lot more impossible than trying to catch wet food. Ravenpaw couldn't speak, couldn't move. He could only stare at the path in front of him, and the dark forest beyond it.

"Well? What are you waiting for? The prey's not just going to throw itself down in front of you." Tigerclaw's gruff tone broke Ravenpaw's trance.

"B-but, I can't hunt there! It's enemy territory! If ShadowClan caught me, they'd kill me!" he protested.

Tigerclaw leaned his face down close to his apprentice's. _Exactly,_ his greedy gaze told him. "You'd best be careful then." he said delicately.

Without another word, Ravenpaw waited until the Thunderpath was clear, then ran across it, straight into the territory of pines and swamp, and straight away from the thing that he feared most.

He didn't look back.

* * *

><p>His breath was coming out in gasps. No matter that he'd chosen this over Tigerclaw, it was still pretty terrifying. <em>Snap!<em> He cringed as yet another pine needle broke under his foot. The squirrel he'd been stalking raced away, practically flying up a tree before disappearing completely.

Sighing, Ravenpaw decided that he would just retrace his steps. He headed closer to the border, where he'd decided to hide his prey as he caught it, in hopes that the Thunderpath and border markers would disguise his scent.

Once reaching his prey, which he had put under the roots of a large oak tree, he realized that the moon was rising. When had the sun set? And when exactly had hunting become so relaxing?

Pushing away dirt and leaves, he pulled out his prey. Three mice, a chaffinch, and a crow. He was especially proud of the crow, since he'd had to leap in the air to get it. Wait a minute. He'd never caught so much in his life. What was going on?

A rustling came from behind a pine tree a ways away. Foxdung! He had to get out of here, quickly!

He grabbed the crow and two of the mice, dashing across the Thunderpath and almost getting hit by a monster. He dropped the fresh-kill behind a berry bush before, gasping, running back to ShadowClan territory again. Stalking slowly forward, as if he was hunting (it was a familiar stance now) he inched closer to the tree with his prey. Once there, he reached out his head, picking it up in his mouth.

_Snap!_ He wasn't the only one that broke pine needles. A kit! Or...no, it was an apprentice, one of the tiny ones that had been at the Gathering. He was looking all around him, terrified, as if a fox was after him. A growl from beyond the kit- _apprentice_ made both of the young cats jump.

_I've stayed too long, _Ravenpaw decided. Slinking away towards the border, he kept his gaze near the apprentice, just in case his mentor, or whoever was there came out suddenly.

Before he knew it, he was at the border, across the Thunderpath, gathering up his prey, and stumbling his way back to home. The pride grew slowly as he walked back, trying not to trip over all his prey. He hadn't been caught and killed by the cold-hearted ShadowClan, and he had hunted better then he'd ever had before in his life. He had proved Tigerclaw wrong. He had to take the long way down the ravine, not wanting to drop and bruise any of his fresh-kill.

He walked into the camp, and spotting Firepaw, trotted over to join him. "Enough for all three of us! And it should taste extra good - it's from ShadowClan territory." He couldn't help boasting.

Firepaw's jaw dropped. "You hunted in ShadowClan territory?"

"That was my task."

"Tigerclaw sent you into enemy territory to hunt!" Firepaw seemed to be in shock. "We must tell Bluestar. That was too dangerous." _No, the dangerous thing would be telling Bluestar_. Ravenpaw quivered at the thought of what Tigerclaw would dream of doing to him if he talked to Bluestar.

Shaking his head rapidly, he meowed, "Look, just keep quiet, okay? I survived. I even caught some prey. That's all there is to it." Ravenpaw's eyes darted to the entrance of the warrior's den, watching as Tigerclaw padded out.

Recovering form his shock, Firepaw was now getting angry. "You survived _this time_!" The deputy's gaze flicking to him and Firepaw. His eyes narrowed to almost invisible glints.

Ravenpaw's heart raced. "Shhh! Tigerclaw's looking! Just eat your share and keep quiet!" Giving his mentor another quick glance, he grabbed his crow and settled down to eat next to Firepaw (slightly awkwardly). He felt ravenous, but about half-way through his meal, he thought he was going to bring it all back up. Tigerclaw was right across from them innocenlty sharing tongues with his Clanmates. "Shall we save some for Graypaw?"

"He went to see Spottedleaf. He cut his paw. I don't know when he'll be back." Firepaw mumbled into his mouse.

After taking one last bite of the crow, he coudln't handle anymore and decided to sleep it off. At least in his den, Tigerclaw wouldn't be able to watch him. "Well, save him what you want. I'm tired; I need to sleep."

Stretching quickly, he shoved into the den, settling himself into his nest. Surprisingly (or maybe not) he fell asleep almost instantly.

* * *

><p><em>"Head home ThunderClan! Tell Bluestar the<em> good news!" Redtail's call rang through the trees and bouncing off of Sunningrocks. Another RiverClan warrior burst from behind a bush, running for his life to the safety of the river. The battered and tired cats of ThunderClan slowly gathered themselves together, ready to return to their camp after battling RiverClan.

Ravenpaw looked around the clearing. Finding his mentor, he asked silently for permission to head back with the others. Tigerclaw nodded tightly. As they walked back deeper into the forest, Ravenpaw felt a pang in his chest. Guilt, maybe, or worry. Why did Tigerclaw let him go without him? He shouldn't have left his mentor.

He crept back through the trees, stopping behind the last tree on the bank. Spotting the giant tabby standing next to the smaller tortoiseshell, he was just about to call out, but stopped when he saw Redtail start to open his mouth. He'd let them talk first, then make his presence known.

Before Redtail could say a word, Tigerclaw attacked him. His huge _fangs_ sank into the deputy's neck, and he collapsed to the ground, dead so quickly. Ravenpaw ran. He ran until he got to the camp and his injuries caught up with him; he collapsed before he could say anything but "Redtail's dead!"

He knew it was horrible, but he had two very distinct thoughts about that day. One, that he had known for a fact that Redtail was dead as soon as Tigerclaw started reaching his head out towards his neck. And two, he was kind of glad that he fainted when he got to camp. It meant that he hadn't had to choose whether to tell the truth or not. Tigerclaw decided for him.

* * *

><p>Finally telling Firepaw the total, complete truth was...well, he wasn't sure if it was good or not. But he felt different. Like everything he'd been feeling inside was now outside. When he fell asleep again, it was just as quickly, but he didn't dream at all. And it was kind of nice.<p>

He was woken the next morning quite abruptly.

"My kits! Someone has taken my kits!"

Under the deputy's direction, he began tearing his den apart. He couldn't smell kit-scent, but if Tigerstar had said to do something, he was going to do it.

Graypaw raced in, helping move the nests around. Finally, they could sufficiently say that their den was a complete mess, so they left to search elsewhere.

Running out of the den, Ravenpaw jumped when Tigerclaw's yowl rang through the clearing. Cat's flocked around him, and Ravenpaw watched as they leaned in close only to recoil at whatever was on the ground. Wiggling his way through, he couldn't help but do the exact same thing as everyone else.

Spottedleaf was dead. And the only thought that Ravenpaw could process was that the sweet medicine cat's life was leaching out of a wound on the back of her neck. He couldn't bring himself to get closer to see if it was _fangs_ that had killed her. He just couldn't do it.

* * *

><p>A little while later, Tigerclaw wasn't looking quite so murderous, the queen's looking not quite so frantic, and Firepaw looking not quite so heartbroken, Ravenpaw couldn't handle sitting around doing nothing and decided to see if the queens and kits needed anything.<p>

He trotted over to the nusery and poked his head in only to have it pushed back out. Frostfur followed him out of the den, her jowls pulled back, showing her teeth gleaming in the dark storm.

"Wh-wha-"

"How dare you try showing your face here, of all places in this camp! Get away from our kits!" Frostfur ripped out, snarling intensely.

Ravenpaw couldn't understand, didn't get it. "I-I-wh-"

"Get out!" Frostfur began running at the apprentice, making him stumble back. What scared him the most wasn't her flashing claws and teeth, it was her face. Frostfur was beautiful, there was no doubt about it, but at that moment, she looked so twisted that the only word that came to mind was _ugly_, although that didn't quite fit. Ravenpaw couldn't even look at her anymore.

And with that, he turned tail and ran, not one bit ashamed of his actions up until Frostfur bit his leg. Just to make sure he understood. Tigerclaw was winning; Ravenpaw was a goner.

* * *

><p>Ravenpaw's spirit was flying. Soaring. Racing...he could scarcely believe it - he had friends that genuinely cared about about him. Graypaw and Firepaw were taking him to <em>Barley.<em> It seemsed so simple and obvious now. Except...he wouldn't be surprised if Tigerclaw just came and hauled him back, threatening him even more, or worse, carrying through with his threats.

Ravenpaw couldn't help the shiver that ran down his back as he jumped onto the next rock on the path.

"Graypaw!" Firepaw called behind him. Their brave friend was in the lead, then the long-haired apprentice, with Ravenpaw bringing up the rear. "I overheard Tigerclaw talking to Darkstripe and Longtail on the night Lionheart was killed. He wants to get rid of Ravenpaw."

"Get _rid _of him? You mean _kill_ him?" Graypaw sat down on a rock, shocked. Both of the apprentices were yelling rather loudly to be heard over the raging storm, so Ravenpaw heard every word of their conversation.

He couldn't say that he was surprised. 'Cause he really wasn't. It hadn't ever mattered how hard he tried to stay on Tigerclaw's good side (if such a thing existed), he was never really out of Tigerclaw's radar. He was always just a nuisance to the huge deputy, something to be _taken care of_. Just like Redtail, and Lionheart too.

"You saw the way Frostfur went for Ravenpaw today? Tigerclaw's been hinting to everyone that Ravenpaw is a traitor. But he'll be safe with Barley." Firepaw was watching him. They were all sitting now, Firepaw higher than the both of them. Here, sheltered by the slope they were climbing, the wind was quieter and Firepaw could speak normally and be heard. Just then, the flame-haired tom jumped to his feet. "Now come on; we must hurry!"

Once over the peak of the bluff, they entered WindClan territory, and the wind tore at their ears, fur and tails, raging around them 'til it was impossible to hear anything except for the ominous _whooooooooooooosh _of the wind. Traveling over the plateau that was enemy territory was, in a word, horrible. How could these crazy, skinny cats live on land like this? Ravenpaw had even heard that they didn't sleep in dens, but rather in various dips and hollows in the ground.

As the image of soaking wet, slick, shivering bodies huddled on the ground with lightening stabbing around them came into his mind, he disregarded the rumour as just that - a rumour. No way any cat would be mousebrained enough to do something like sleep with no cover at a time like _this._

Finally, the time came. They reached the edge of Clan territory, and Ravenpaw could see Twoleg lights in the distance.

Firepaw padded next to him. "We can't take you any farther, Ravenpaw. We have to get back and find Yellowfang before the storm has passed." It was all Ravenpaw could do to nod. The fear had struck him once again. He barely knew this cat Barley. Yes, it made sense to them, but what would the peaceful loner think?

"Will you be able to find Barley alone?" Thunder crashed.

"Yes, I remember the way."

Then Graypaw pitched in, "Watch out for those dogs."

Nodding again, he replied, "I will!" He had to say it. If they left, and the worst came to worse, what would he do? "How can you be sure Barley will welcome me?"

His friends obviously didn't share this fear. "Just tell him you caught an adder once!" Graypaw said, butting him on the shoulder.

Firepaw licked his chest comfortingly. "Go, and don't worry; I'll make sure everyone knows you didn't betray ThunderClan."

_Great StarClan._ All these worries popping up at the last, most critical second. "What if Tigerclaw comes looking for me?" He put all his effort in not letting his voice shake.

Firepaw looked him straight on, not a shadow or string of doubt in his eyes. His _calm, _steady eyes. "He won't. I shall tell him you are dead."

* * *

><p>Ravenpaw tripped over his paws, splattering more mud over himself. Where in the world was Barley's barn? He'd never been there, just in the area. And it wasn't likely for the loner to be outside at a time like this. Cats were nocturnal, not stark raving mad.<p>

Well, this was the place where Bluestar had lost a life, and Barley had come from...Ravenpaw grunted in frustration. He hadn't seen where Barley had come from 'cause he'd been fighting nettles in the ditch.

"What are you doing out here at a time like this, little Clan cat?" The voice cut through the storm as easy as teeth through mice flesh, which surprised Ravenpaw, since the storm was still raging overhead.

Then he turned around and watched as a black-and-white cat walked closer to him. It was Barley. And that surprised him even more. "Wh-what are you doing out here?"

"Well, I believe I asked first, but if you really want to know, I am out hunting on a whim. And you? You are one of Bluestar's, are you not?"

"Yes. I..." Ravenpaw didn't know what to say. _I'm running away from a murderer, can I live with you?_

Barley seemed to sense his discomfort and meowed, "Yes, this storm really is quite wretched. How about we go back to the barn, and we can talk there?"

Ravenpaw nodded and followed the confident loner off into the dark.

* * *

><p>"Better?" Now Ravenpaw was slightly more dry, and really, this <em>hay<em> stuff wasn't that uncomfortable. "Now, how about you tell me just why you're here all alone, at night, in the middle of one of the biggest storms I've ever seen?"

_Foxdung._ He still didn't know how to tell Barley. He looked up at the tom, and his inner battle must've showed on his face, since Barley just said gently, "How about the beginning?"

Ravenpaw sucked in a huge breath. The beginning. Not the shortest way, but he guessed it was the best way. "Well, when I was six moons old, I was made an apprentice, and my mentor was Tigerclaw. He was rough, but it wasn't too bad. Most of the time, I could handle it. But one day, there was a battle, and..."

* * *

><p>Barley looked down at the skinny tom lying in the hay with concern in his eyes. The Clan cat had fallen asleep, exhausted after retelling all the horrors he'd been exposed to in the past moons. Some of it was a little hard for Barley to understand - what was the point of everybody getting so concerned about territory? - but he'd gotten the gist of it.<p>

Ravenpaw wasn't the only young one who'd had to suffer through hard difficulties. But he knew that, out of everybody alive, the young were the ones who didn't deserve it, not in the slightest.

He'd heard of the Clans' _StarClan_. But if they were so sure that their ancestors were watching over them, then why did these dead cats let things like this happen? That was the reason that, though he had received multiple invitations from various leaders to join their Clans, he had been polite yet firm in making them understand his beliefs.

And yet...he couldn't help but wonder. He hadn't been completely honest to Ravenpaw. He had been out on a whim, but he hadn't been hungry in the slightest. He just had felt like he should go out and find it. Find _what_, he hadn't been sure of, but now...

* * *

><p><em>Ravenpaw woke up to the sounds<em> of the farm. To his ears, the best sounds in the world. Purring, he sat up, stretching out his front legs and kneading the hay. Leaping down from the loft, he padded silently out of the barn and walked out to the edge of the field. Facing towards the Clans' territories, over the forest that was once his home, it was the perfect place to watch the sun rise.

He had been living with Barley for a few moons now. He was only bit smaller than Barley, but he had a feeling that he wasn't growing much anymore. He was a pretty slightly cat. The first moon in the barn had been hard. He'd been really jumpy about Tigerclaw, but he'd also really missed his old home; Firepaw and Graypaw and their crazy ideas, Bluestar and her calm, kind leadership, cats like Whitestorm, who'd never failed to try and make his apprenticeship a little easier, and the trees.

That was part of the reason he was here right now. The trees, and watching as the sun rose slowly, its rays hitting the leaves at just the right angle to make Ravenpaw's chest ache. But he was also here because of three specific cats. Redtail, Lionheart, and Tigerclaw. Every morning, he would come out here and think.

He'd been thinking quite a lot actually. And he thought that he might've figured it out. He knew, since that day that a small kittypet had joined the Clan, that he would have to fight fire. And he had, as hard as a little cowardly cat like he could. Or so he thought.

If he'd been fighting off Firepaw as hard as he could, then why had he been one of his best and only friends? Because his battle with fire hadn't been with a good, honest cat.

It had been with a vicious, bloodthirsty cat. Tigerclaw had told him to fight fire. And Ravenpaw had, to the very best of his abilities. In the end, that could be all that StarClan asked for, right?

* * *

><p><strong>First things first, I am aware that many things in Warriors are a bit hazy, but due to the magic of Fanfiction, poetic license, and AU, I can do what I want. Lol.<strong>

**Anywho. I'm sorry that I waited, like, two weeks to upload this. I know I said it was almost done, and it was, but once it was finished, I was pretty sick of it. So I didn't edit it for a week or so. But now it's finally done! And much longer than I expected it to be.**

**Hoping that you enjoy and review, regardless of whether you enjoy it or not...**

**:D**


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